1. In October 2004 a young woman was arrested in Denpasar, Bali, Indonesia for allegedly smuggling 4.2 kg of marijuana into that country on a commercial airline flight from her native Australia. On the face of it, this storyA. Is too commonplace to mention. Lots of people smuggle lots of drugs lots of places, you know? This is boring - change the channel
B. proves that Australian journalists don't like Indonesia and seize upon any pretext to make that country look bad. This is the first-ever case of anyone IMPORTING marijuana to Bali ( where it grows wild), but people are always being caught taking cocaine TO Colombia, and taking heroin to Afghanistan, and smuggling sand into Saudi Arabia - and none of those stories gets this kind of international attention.
C. has a certain "man bites dog" quality about it, since not only is this the wrong direction for smuggling, but marijuana hasn't been smuggled in commercial airline luggage since the 1970's. Other drugs have been, but mj is too bulky and too easily detected. However this just proves this woman is unusually stupid or was using her own product at the time. Although all her drug tests were clear.
D. Makes one, as Hercule Poirot would say, "furiously to think."
2. This young woman, Schapelle Corby of Queensland, had no criminal record and no financial means to purchase the drugs, worth an estimated $40,000 in Australia. This must mean her previous smuggling efforts were successful - amazingly so, since marijuana is sold for far less in Bali than its cost in Australia - but she must have made it profitable somehow. Or the Corby family grew their own, though an investigation by the Queensland police found nothing. Schapelle's job at her family's fish and chip shop was just cover for her nefarious deeds. An even better cover was this innocent-loking photo taken in Brisbane airport by her mother right before the fateful flight. We are looking at
A. A bunch of seemingly ordinary innocent tourists who were working with several governments to help conceal the truth about JFK and the Men in Black, and at this moment were blocking the view of an investigative reporter trying to photograph Elvis, who was slipping quietly away behind them.
B. A bunch of seemingly ordinary innocent tourists who understood the grave risks they were taking by smuggling drugs, but who could NOT stop Schapelle's Mum from following them everywhere with that bloody camera, photographing everything in sight. On a previous trip to the Gold Coast she ran around taking random snapshots out to sea yelling "THERE'S the Loch Ness Monster, duckie!" until they locked her in a portable toilet. She came SO close to blowing their cover here, but what could they do except stand close, smile big and try to look innocent and ordinary?
C. A bunch of seemingly ordinary innocent tourists who may not have been the sharpest quills in Queensland but did understand the importance of looking good at all times. "I may be thick as a plank, mate, but I know how to comb my hair and look cool before risking the death penalty in a foreign country" - that's a Queensland expression, or should be.
D. A bunch or ordinary, innocent tourists.
3. The marijuana was unconcealed in two transparent space bags, one inside the other, with the inner bag cut releasing the smell. The inner bag was never fingerprinted, authorities claiming that too many people had handled it - these guys, for example. Their careless handling indicates
A. There is a shortage of gloves in Bali.
B. It was Indonesia's Take Our Daughters To Work Day, and they had left their gloves at home in order to better hug their daughters.
C. They knew their superiors wouldn't care how they handled the bag, since Schapelle's fingerprints weren't on it and thus fingerprint evidence wouldn't matter. DNA-testing of the marijuana ( for country of origin and to see if Schapelle's hair fragments were in it, as they would have been if she had packed the bag) was never done either.
D. Wait a minute - how did they KNOW that Schapelle's fingerprints weren't on the bag, and that all these forensic tests, which should have been the strong point of their own case, weren't necessary?
4. Presiding Judge Linton Sirait had never found anyone innocent in 500 previous drug cases, not that that has anything to do with anything. In this photograph, he is A. running his fingers over the space bag with a sense of wonder, fascinated by Australian plastics technology.
B. momentarily forgetting where he is and what he is doing, not realizing he is accidentally contaminating fingerprint evidence ( which everyone mysteriously knew wasn't necessary anyway).
C. carefully demonstrating to his countrymen how NOT to contaminate fingerprint evidence next time.
D. sending a not-so-subtle hint to the rest of the court that certain lines of inquiry would not be allowed in this case.
5. Schapelle's boogie board bag would have looked much different in Brisbane airport if it contained only her board and flippers as she claimed, or if it also held 4 kilos of marijuana. Security camera footage might have shown if her bag were thin or fat, instantly exonerating or condemning her. The camera footage somehow went missing from both Brisbane and Sydney airports ( where she changed planes) and from the customs check area in Denpasar as well. Schapelle's family and lawyers were given varying explanations at different times - the cameras were under repair, the footage had been wiped automatically after a set period of time, the cameras were only turned on if an "important person" was passing through the airport. What's going on here?
A. airport security? In this peaceful enlightened age, who worries about THAT any more? So someone accidentally left a hundred million dollar system that millions depend on turned off - so what?
B. It was International Take Our Daughters to Work So They Can Fix the Cameras Day, scrupulously observed in both countries.
C. It's not very nice to say so, but most of these security jobs are government make-work anyway. They take some bogan who would otherwise be on the dole for life and pay him a nice middle class salary to sit in a high booth in an airport with his finger hovering over the camera button, ready to turn them on if he sees anybody important. It's just Schapelle's bad luck that he didn't think SHE looked important, or that he had stepped out to the lavatory during the time she was passing through.
D. Holmes looked thoughtful. "I see, Watson. You are sketching out a theory by which everything they say from the beginning is false."
D. Holmes looked thoughtful. "I see, Watson. You are sketching out a theory by which everything they say from the beginning is false."
6. Many foreigners can barely find Australia on a map, rarely follow an Australian news story, and will judge that country solely on this case. That's no problem, since from the beginning Australia's leaders have risen to the occasion. In fact their character and conduct throughout this saga reminds you most of what famous foreign leader?
A. Nelson Mandela
A. A master criminal who had one very unlucky day.
B. A silly girl who thought she could get away with an unprecedented, unheard of, impossible crime if she smiled big and strolled through customs whistling.
C. a woman covering for her guilty brother, who is a master criminal and would have gotten away with it if he had been in the lead - that transparent bag trick would have worked for him. She has been standing in for him uncomplainingly for five years, having never once thought of telling the truth and cutting a deal with the authorities.
D. An innocent caught in a calamity she doesn't understand or deserve but who has faced it with immense courage and dignity. A credit to her country and her faith. A Lady Guinevere for our time.
SCORING: If you bothered to finish the quiz and answered "D" more than twice, you are probably not an Australian. And that's unfortunate, since the facts of Miss Schapelle's case are not complicated and remain unchanged since the time of her trial when 95 percent of Aussies believed in her innocence. What has changed is public perception, fueled by the great cataract of media sensationalism, distortions and plain lies. The process by which a handful of media owners is able to turn public opinion against an obviously innocent woman as easily as turning a dial on a microwave is interesting, but would not work for a moment if people would look away from the tv and think for themselves. Fortunately for Schapelle's enemies, few Aussies are willing to argue with their television, and all are watching the same televised rubbish. One small problem with that, mate - Orstrayla is not the whole world. Far to the north where people walk around rightside up is a fat dumb happy place called A-mer-i-ca. This place is full of strange foreign folk with strange foreign accents who don't know vegemite from dolomite from kryptonite, but who recognize a glaring injustice when they see one and, once having met her, instinctively love your national daughter as much as you used to.
Co-lo-ra-doIn an obscure corner of this faraway foreign place is a nook called Co-lo-ra-do. John Denver used to yodel on and on about it. Here's a link
( Yeah, I know. A little of that goes a long way). But some parts of Colorado are worth yodeling about. For instance every year at a university in a city called Boulder - I am not making that name up - they hold something called the Conference on World Affairs.
The average Aussie has still not grasped why Schapelle's case is a world affair, but justice and honor are not one thing among crocodiles and kangaroos and another half a world away where the water goes down the drain in the other direction. Both our justice systems are copied from England - we are both heir to the tradition that there is a law above the king, a law above the temporary majority, a Divine justice above all human standards. Some of us, occasionally, remember.
Schapelle Corby is a permanent part of Australian history whether you like it or not.
Tara Hack's song and video for Schapelle is the first international protest ever on behalf of an Australian citizen.
Ganja Queen, a sensationalized but sympathetic documentary about Schapelle has been shown multiple times on on HBO, an American premium cable channel with a subscription audience larger than the population of Australia. This story is not going away. Schapelle's hard core supporters are not going away. Some Australian authorities wish this case would go away in the interest of better relations with Indonesia - you might tell them appeasement is not a viable long-term strategy -- ask 6C.
One more question:
One more question:
All the uncertainties about this case make you want to
A. have another drink and change the channel.
B. spend a quarter to call one of the honorable journalists left in Australia and ask him to explain it to you.
C. spend fifty cents and call both of them.
D. take another look at the FACTS, without the media propaganda.
You will always have a home here too, gentle one. God grant you soon to find it.
